"...to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate..."

Life Things

“The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Last weekend my husband and I were up in our hometown for some family business. You know, life things. My sister and brother-in-law were gracious to allow us to stay in their home even though they were on vacation. On Sunday while my husband went to check on things, I searched their kitchen for something to eat, but naturally, there was nothing because they knew they were going to be gone for two weeks. I then texted a good friend in town, “Could I come to your house in a bit and have a sandwich? Nothing special. Sis doesn’t have any food cause they’re traveling.” I received a thumbs up, and drove over to be treated to a turkey and cheese sandwich, a few potato chips, and a chocolate chip cookie, all delivered with love. My friend Ann knows how to take care of others.

I have been pondering how we need one another during these terrifying times, that community is vital to the human condition. My simple request and the making of a sandwich is a perfect example of how it all fits together. It is not a weakness for ask for assistance. Most of us are wired to want to help. Remember how you’ve felt when you have assisted someone in need. It’s a dopamine boost. We may think we can do everything on our own, but in some ways it is short-sighted and maybe a little selfish. Look beyond your bubble, hold out a hand, and I promise someone is there to take it.

If you need help, ask for it. If you can offer assistance, do it. Look out for one another. It’s our greatest resistance.

“Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.” ~Mark Twain

A few suggestions of love in action:

1. Text or message someone you know needs a lift.

2. If possible, call or visit your mother or father. If not, be kind to a stranger, especially if he/she is older than you.

3. Volunteer your time or donate to a favorite charity.

4. Think about your own gifts. How can they be used in service? Write. Bake. Build. Mow. Drive. Teach. Babysit. Translate. Advocate. Etc.

5. Reach out to someone you haven’t talked to in awhile.

6. Send a little gift or flowers for no particular reason.

7. Invite someone you care about out for coffee or lunch or a walk or a chat.

8. Extend an invitation for friends/family to come over for dinner, or go out to a restaurant and offer to pick up the tab.

9. If someone asks for help, don’t hesitate. Just say, “I’ll be there for you.”

10. If you are in need, don’t hesitate. Just say, “Please help me.”

Oh, and attempt to walk through this life, even it is a freaking pit of toxic quicksand, with grace and humility and wonder and honor and forgiveness and love. Don’t give in to cynicism. Honor your boundaries yet know your power. Listen and respect one another’s stories. Cruelty is never an excuse. Fight for justice. Empathy is a super power.

Kindness is always the best decision. Hope is the most powerful practice.

“Our prime purpose in this life is to help others. And if you can’t help them, at least don’t hurt them.” ~Dalai Lama

Here are a few more examples of the quiet kindness we have received in the last week while dealing with life things:

*phone calls with a few fabulous friends

*texts from our children

*phone calls with our siblings (our greatest advocates)

*offers of help and support from various friends

*lunch with my amazing sister-in-law and her wondrous mother

*a neighborhood friend checking in our kitty when I knew I’d be late returning home

*pictures of California grandson sent to our Aura frame (a extraordinary kindness)

*a general sense of community resonating from our magical circle

“Three things in human life are important: the first is to be kind; the second is to be kind; and the third is to be kind.” ~Henry James

Life Things is a reader-supported publication and will always be free to all who wish to read my rambling words. I also am honored and humbled if you monetarily support my writing. Thank you.