not okay, but gonna be alright
cece's musings, rage, wtf's, whatever it takes to get through this madness
CeCe’s Musings, born during the time of Covid when I was pondering the effects of the deadly disease that plundered the world. Masks? Vaccines? Social distancing? To gather or not to gather? I mused about how we all seemed to be navigating the new landscape, how some weren’t believing the science, and how others were bunkering down until it all went away.
Such reflection now seems almost innocent compared to what is going down now in our country. CeCe’s Musings? More like CeCe’s Rage. CeCe’s Disbelief. CeCe’s WTF. The world’s richest man has taken over the U.S Treasury while those “in charge” twiddle their useless thumbs. The world’s stupidest/cruelest/smallest man is now president/mad king. The world’s most spineless creatures follow him around kissing his behind. Dangerous and unqualified toadies are quickly filling up his cabinet. Children are targeted at their schools. Workers are afraid to go to work. People everywhere are scared they will lose their jobs, their benefits, their social security, their Medicare/Medicaid, their life savings, their freedoms. To inaccurately quote Whoopi Goldberg’s character in Ghost, “We in danger, boys and girls.”
A note to all who thought, “This won’t affect me.” Guess what? It already has. We are in the eye of the storm that doesn’t look like it’s moving out to sea any time soon.
I’m so full of rage, but where does it get me? I tried listening to one of my political podcasts today as I walked, but had to turn it off. Because here’s the thing: I already knew this was going to be bad. Yes, the depths of their malice is like the pain of a thousand needles, and yes, I am weary of the stupidity and inhumanity, but I also need to protect my sanity. I switched over to my songs, quietly singing along some favorites. Music is my therapy, my salvation, my heart.
During the Grammys on Sunday evening a song played alongside clips from the L.A. fires:
“I am not okay, I’m barely getting by, I’m losing track of days, and losing sleep at night, I am not okay.”
Jelly Roll’s song covers his mental illness and struggles with addiction, but the lyrics capture everything that is raging through my heart and mind, and I know there are many of us feeling the same way these days. Terror. Grief. Moments of peace. Dashed dreams. Darkness. Worry. Bits of laughter. Shock. Hope.
“I know, I can’t be the only one, Who’s holding on for dear life, But God knows, I know, when it’s all said and done, I’m not okay, but it’s all gonna be alright, It’s not okay, But we’re all gonna be alright.”
It’s where I want to live, this place called Hope. I want to believe we’re all going to be alright. Because without Hope, there is Nothing, and I will not believe in Nothing.
I Am Not Okay, Jelly Roll, (official video)
(Take some control and call your representatives and senators. I have. Look up their information or use the 5 Calls app. Make your voice heard. Don’t just scream. Use your words.)
Adding another heart to my collection. And tonight…no rage. Just good food, a glass of wine, and baking cookies with the husband. Life stuff. Alright stuff. Hope stuff.