3 worries, 3 delights, 3 antidotes

cece's musings or how to stay sane during the apocalypse

I’ve been rather stuck the past few weeks. My lingering cold didn’t help, but the chaos and cruelty that has been ransacking our country has led me down a dark path. My ruminating tends to take on a scratchy, blobby form, kind of like the scribbling that was often in Charlie Brown’s thought bubbles when he was frustrated. I tend to verbalize this black mood with an extended groan. When I’m not cussing, I’m moaning, “Mmmmmmmmrrrrrgggghhhhhugh.”

Yet…I refuse to permanently live in this scratchy, annoying, grieving mess. I will search for peace. I can do small things that are helping. I wish for hope….every day. How do we get ourselves out of this quicksand of a dumpster fire? We learn, we grieve, we smile, and we do. Or, as one of my friends texted this morning something that Maya Angelou told a reporter, “Every storm runs out of rain.” Right now the fierce winds are attempting to blow down our republic, yet eventually it will subside. We will close our umbrellas and turn our faces toward the sun. We’ll navigate around the debris and puddles while figuring out how to rebuild.

But until we get through this hurricane of hurling despair, I’m going to focus on three worries, three delights, and three antidotes to doomscrolling. Here goes…

3 Worries:

1. The arrest of Mahmoud Khalil, a Columbia University student, a permanent US resident who has not been charged with any crime. He has spoken out about Israel’s mistreatment of Palestinians. This is a clear abandonment of the 1st Amendments protections of free speech.

2. The USDA’s slashing of more than one billion dollars that could severely impact children, farmers, and local food banks. More like make America hungry again.

3. Elon Musk calling Senator Mark Kelly a traitor for visiting and supporting Ukraine. Kelly’s response was, ““Traitor? Elon, if you don’t understand that defending freedom is a basic tenet of what makes America great and keeps us safe, maybe you should leave it to those of us who do.” (A worry and a burn. You go, Sen. Kelly.)

3 Delights:

1. Yesterday I spotted a hawk perched on a neighborhood fence. It didn’t appear to have spotted prey, yet it was alert to its surroundings. Nature close up is magnificent.

2. Over the weekend I had a random encounter with a woman while standing in line at Home Goods. In four short minutes I learned she was in the middle of her twentieth move, she was returning furniture that wouldn’t fit in her new house, and they were downsizing to half the space they had in their previous home. I adore these types of interactions. They give me hope for us awful humans attempting to walk upright in this crazy world.

3. Costco. Oh, Costco, my new alternative to Amazon and Target. I delight in your big old warehouse self. A month into our new membership, I’ve stocked up on paper goods, cleaning supplies, coffee beans, and also discovered their Kirkland brand of Italian sparkling water. Fantastico!

3 Antidotes to Doomscrolling:

1. I’ve been knitting a new project, a hot pink sweater for one of our granddaughters. Every row is meditative. Sometimes I put on a light tv show (Currently recommending Kate Hudson’s Running Point on Netflix. Serious fun.), but mostly I sit in my big chair and listen to the click click of the big wooden needles.

2. I’m trying to learn Italian on Duolingo. Io sono Christie. Mi sono perso. Adoro la pizza. I have a long way to go, but we’re hoping to travel to Italy soon, so I’d like to be able to at least understand a few words outside of ciao and pasta.

3. Spring is coming! I’ve spotted small buds on trees signaling tulips and magnolia blooms are only weeks away. Spring is a do-over, and after our crappy winter and these past two terrifying months, peeks of purple and pink whisper, “Hope is right around the corner.”

If you’d like to share your worries, joys, and antidotes, leave them in the comments/messages. We need our communities, our people, those who keep us out of the scary woods that currently are populated by ignorant, callous, ruthless monsters who do not care who they harm. Let’s show them we are united in truth and love and persistence and freaking delightful joy.

We visited the Charles M. Schulz Museum in Santa Rosa, California, in November of 2023. It is a gorgeous space that made both of us choke up a bit. My husband identifies with Charlie Brown, while I’m Lucy (although I would never pull the football out from him!). Schulz was a generous, big-hearted, creative genius.

A few suggestions if you’re feeling hopeless:

If you’d like good news sent to your inbox, I recommend subscribing to Scott Dworkin at The Dworkin Report. He posts good news everyday about what groups are doing to resist this authoritarian takeover of our freedoms.

If you’d like inspiration, watch Kate Bowler interview Coach K. It will make you want to up your game.

If you’d like to just smile, watch the luminous 99 year old Dick Van Dyke dance to Chris Martin’s music. Sigh…